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Proverbs 22:6

Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.

My thought as Mother’s Day approaches is: have I done my best? Have I done everything possible to raise them up to be Christ followers? I worry sometimes that I have made to many mistakes, that I haven’t been a good enough mom, that I have harmed them in some irreparable way that I will never be able to fix. My two oldest daughters,19 and 18 respectively, have a relationship with God, but are still figuring things out. I watch them and wish they would embrace Jesus with all of their hearts. I can’t force this on them. I worry that I have not given them enough information about Jesus, for them to want a relationship with him. I worry that I have not been the role model of a Godly woman that I should be.

I know they are not perfect, but there are times when they are fighting and screaming at each other that I wonder if I’ve done something horribly wrong. There are times when they are selfish, mean, disobedient, defiant, and rebellious that I think, is this what I have modeled to them? Is this what I have taught them? It scares me, because this is not how I want them to be. This is not how I want to be. I want them to see Jesus in me. This is what I strive for, but I wonder if it is enough.

Then in his mercy, God gives me a glimpse into the core of their hearts:

Cherokee, my 19 year old daughter, is expecting my first grandchild in mid-June. Cherokee usually listens to secular music, but one day when running errands with her, I noticed her car radio on WBGL, our local christian radio station. I commented on it and she said, ” well, I don’t want my child listening to that other stuff.”

Earlier in the school year, Kiowa, my 18 year old daughter, noticed that an autistic boy in her school was being bullied by a group of boys. Kiowa stood up for him and took him under her wing. She reported it to the teacher, nothing was done. She went to the dean of students, nothing was done. She then, wrote a very well written letter to the principal, telling her the entire story. The principal called Kiowa in to her office to hear from her what was going on. Something was done and the bullying ended. Kiowa was called a snitch from then on, but it was a name she wore proudly.

Cree, my 16 year daughter, is a student leader in her youth group. She has a heart for the hurting kids in her group. Many of them come to her with questions about Jesus and being saved. They look up to her and she is a role model for them.

Talon is my oldest son. He is 13 and like Kiowa, he is a protector of those who are bullied. Last week, another 6th grader was being put in the trash can by another student. Talon happened to be in the restroom where this was taking place. Talon grabbed the bully and shoved him away. Talon then helped the kid out of the trash can and they went their separate ways. Talon also has a heart for serving others. We will often find him helping others mow their grass, shoveling snow, or giving bottles of water to the mail carrier in the middle of the Summer.

Ty, my 11 year old is very active. I never really know what is going on in his mind. About a month ago, he came up to me and asked, “Would Jesus tell on someone?” I told him that Jesus doesn’t have to tell on anyone because he was able to deal with things on his own. Ty proceeded to tell me that a boy in his class had pushed him and Ty did tell. I told him that it was okay to tell, because sometimes we need help dealing with situations like that. I thought it was great that he wanted to know what Jesus would do in that situation.

I was grateful that God would give me these wonderful glimpses into the hearts of my children. I do worry at times and there are times when I feel completely helpless in parenting, but this verse comes with a promise: If we train up our children in the way they should go, when they are old they will not depart from it. We all make mistakes, but if we do our best to raise up Godly children then we can trust God with the rest. Our children may wander from the path, they may turn away from God for a time, but God will bring them back. This is his promise, if we do our part.

My daily prayer is for wisdom, patience, perseverance, and God’s grace as I parent my 5 children. They are all unique individuals, responding to different ways of correction. With God beside me, I apologize when I mess up and move on. I make mistakes, but I trust God to use those mistakes for our good. Trust God to walk beside you in this journey of parenting. He will give you the wisdom, patience, perseverance and grace that you need in parenting your children. God is ALWAYS with us…ALWAYS!

identity in Christ

 

I have spent a lifetime (42 years to be exact) believing the lies of Satan. I believed that I was a failure. I believed that I would never accomplish anything worthwhile. I believed that I was nothing. I believed that I could never be used by God. Satan does a great job of convincing us that we will never be good enough, but it is a lie. Satan is a liar! Do not believe anything that he says! I am here to tell you the truth. God’s truth, that comes straight from his word. God is not a liar. God will never contradict himself, so what he says about us, we can believe as the truth. I have listed a few of the truths about our true identity found in the Bible:

  • I Am A Joint Heir With Christ– Romans 8: 16-17
  • I Am Alive With Christ– Ephesians 2:5
  • I Am The Light Of The World– Matthew 5:14
  • God Delights In Our Well-Being– Psalm 35:27
  • I Am More Than A Conqueror Through Christ– Romans 8:37
  • I Belong To A Royal Priesthood– 1 Peter 2:9
  • I Am God’s Adopted Child– Ephesians 1:5
  • I Am An Ambassador For Christ– 2 Corinthians 5:20
  • I Am Forgiven Of All My Sins And Washed In The Blood– Ephesians 1:7
  • I Am Redeemed From The Curse Of sin, Sickness, and Poverty– Deuteronomy 28:15-68; Galatians 3:13
  • I Am Greatly Loved By God– Romans 1:7; Ephesians 2:4; Colossians 3:12; 1 Thessalonians 1:4
  • I Am Submitted To God, And The Devil Flees From Me Because I Resist Him In The Name Of Jesus– James 4:7
  • It Is Not I Who Live, But Christ Lives In Me– Galatians 2:20
  • For God Has Not Given Us A Spirit Of Fear; But Of Power, Love, And A Sound Mind-2 Timothy 1:7
  • I can do all things through Christ Jesus-Philippians 4:13

Take some time to meditate on these verses and let the truth of God’s love find it’s way into your heart. God wants nothing more than for you to believe how special you are to him.

Some of the above scriptures were found at http://www.joycemeyer.org.

 

God’s Gift

Jesus on the Cross John 3-16

John 3:16

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

We all remember memorizing this verse in Sunday school class as a child,  but have any of us really meditated on this verse and let the meaning of it sink into our spirits and our hearts. I have always known what the verse meant, but it wasn’t until recently, that I really started to meditate on it and really let the Holy Spirit use this verse to impact my life.

For God

Who is God? In order for this scripture to have an impact on our hearts, we need to know who God is:

El-Olam: The Everlasting God; Isaiah 40: 28-31

El-Shaddai: God Almighty; Genesis 17:1 Psalm 91:1

El-Roi: The One Who Sees; Genesis 16:13

El-Elyon: The Most High God; Genesis 14:17-20 Isaiah 14:13-14

Adonai: Lord; Malachi 1:6

I AM: Exodus 3:14 John 8:58

There are so many more! To many to list here. I encourage you to visit http://www.smilegodlovesyou.org for a full list of ALL the names of God and discover for yourself how Beyond Description God really is!

So Loved

We need to understand that God loves us! When God loves, he loves with every fiber of his being. He holds nothing back.

Adored

Cared For

Delighted In

Was Passionately Attached To

Had Affection For

Longed For

The World

God loves everyone in the entire world! Every person, of every nation, of every ethnic group, of every tongue, of every neighborhood, of every family. Not one person escapes the love of God! That is so AWESOME!

Earth

Nations

Continents

Countries

Ethnic Groups

Individuals

ALL PEOPLE

That He Gave

God gives us things because He loves us. He delights in us and and wants us to be full of joy.

Put Into The Hands Of

Relinquished

Transferred

Presented

Gave As A Gift

His One and Only Son

Could you give up, sacrifice your child if you knew it would save the life of another person? Honestly, I don’t know if I could. God did! He sacrificed his only child to save my life, to save your life. I don’t deserve that gift. Why would He allow His Son to go through so much pain for us, sinners who don’t deserve the gift of life? He loves us that much! Let it sink in…God loves you so much that He sent His Son to die a horrific death on a cross for you and me. God loves YOU!

God relinquished His only child into the hands of men to be tortured. His only child. His only son. For you and for me.

That Whoever Believes

All we have to do is BELIEVE that Jesus, the only son of God, died to forgive and forget our sins and we will have eternal life. Our good deeds will NOT save us! Our righteous lifestyle will NOT save us! We have to BELIEVE that Jesus died to save us from the pits of Hell!

Has Faith In

Accepts

Has Hope In

Is Certain Of

Has Confidence In

In Him

JESUS

Shall Not Perish

Be thrown into the lake of fire for eternity

But Have Eternal Life

We will live FOREVER in heaven with God, our ABBA Father and Jesus, his son. In heaven, where there is no pain, no sorrow, no tears, only JOY!

Remember always, that God loves you more than anything in this world. He does not wish us to suffer an eternity in the lake of fire. His deepest desire is for us to join him in heaven and he made a way for that to happen through Jesus. If you have never accepted Jesus into your heart, consider doing so now. You have to ask him into your heart. He will not force you to accept him. Jesus is a gift given to us by God, but it is up to us to receive that gift. God loves you and he is waiting for you.

Gods love

 

I like the idea behind random acts of kindness, but I prefer to call them Intentional Acts of Love. The freedictionary.com defines random as having no specific pattern, purpose, or objective. On the other hand the same website defines intentional as something being done deliberately or on purpose. If the Holy Spirit dwells within us, then our acts of kindness will come from a heart of love. They will not be acts of kindness that have no specific pattern, purpose or objective. They will become acts of love done deliberately to glorify God and on purpose to bring the ministry of Jesus to a hurting world. Luke 10:27 says:

He answered, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’ and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’

Romans 13:8-10

Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for whoever loves others has fulfilled the law.  The commandments, “You shall not commit adultery,” “You shall not murder,” “You shall not steal,” “You shall not covet,” and whatever other command there may be, are summed up in this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.”  Love does no harm to a neighbor. Therefore love is the fulfillment of the law.

When the Holy Spirit dwells within us, then we will be filled with love for God and love for other people, regardless of their race, socio-economic background or denominational ties. We will weep when others weep, we will rejoice when others rejoice, our hearts will be burdened to bring the lost sheep of the world back into the fold where they can be loved by a compassionate God. What can we do to act with love and bring Jesus to a hurting world? Listed below are some suggestions:

  • Encourage someone who may be going through tough times.
  • Mentor an at risk teen or child.
  • Make blankets for the homeless.
  • adopt an elderly person in a nursing home or in your neighborhood.
  • clean the house of an elderly person or single mom.
  • Bless a single mom with some mom time by taking the kids for a couple of hours or an afternoon.
  • do errands for an elderly person or a person who has just had surgery.
  • Take baked goods as a token of appreciation to your local fire station.
  • Pick up trash in a park or a roadway.
  • adopt a soldier.
  • Buy a fast food gift card for a homeless person.
  • Put the shopping cart back in its’ place
  • put other shopping carts back in their places.
  • Leave a generous tip for a restaurant server.
  • Send a note of encouragement to a stranger.
  • Be kind to someone who is not always kind to you.
  • Give up the great parking space to someone else.
  • Visit someone in the hospital or nursing home who may not get many visitors.
  • Be a voice of encouragement to those working in hospice care.
  • Give your mail carrier bottles of water during the hot Summer months.
  • Leave a box of doughnuts and coffee for your garbage collectors.
  • Be that person who brings a sugar-free desert to the next gathering for any diabetics who may be attending.
  • Make a positive comment on a website or blog.
  • Mentor a teen mom.
  • Build a REAL community with those on your street, where neighbors do things for one another and love each other.

I have given you 25 ideas and the internet is filled with many, many more. If we have a heart of compassion for those we meet in our daily lives and intentionally look for ways to be Jesus to others, God will open the doors to opportunities to serve others on a daily basis. Live intentionally, with love, like Jesus lived.

Scriptures on Faith

gods-love-poured-out-grace-romans-5-8

 

I have always been prone to worrying. I worry about money. I worry about my kids. I worry about vehicles breaking down. You name it, I worry about it. God wants us to trust him with our burdens. Nothing is to big for him to carry for us. God loves us and wants us to live peace-filled, joyful lives. The next time you feel anxious about something, meditate on one(or more) of the verses below and let the peace of God fill your heart. Give it to God, he can handle it!

Jeremiah 32:17

“Ah, Sovereign Lord, you have made the heavens and the earth by your great power and your outstretched arm. Nothing is to hard for you.”

Matthew 7:7-8

“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.”

1 John 5:14-15

This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us-whatever we ask-we know that we have what we asked of him.

Hebrew 4:16

Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.

Matthew 17:20-21

He replied, “Because you have so little faith, I tell you the truth, if you have faith as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘move from here to there’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.”

Matthew 21:21-22

Jesus replied, “I tell you the truth, if you have faith and do not doubt, not only can you do what was done to the fig tree, but also you can say to this mountain, ‘Go, throw yourself into the sea,’ and it will be done. If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer.”

Luke 17:5-6

The apostles said to the Lord, “Increase our faith.” He replied, “If you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mulberry tree, ‘be uprooted and planted in the sea,’ and it will obey you.”

James 1:6

But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.

Hebrews 11:1

Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.

Hebrews 13:8

Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.

potters hands

 

I recently read two books written by a missionary by the name of Kim Abernethy. These two books (In This Place & In Every Place) chronicle the years her family spent in service primarily in West Africa. What I have loved about these books is Kim’s candid observations on the condition of her own spirit and her willingness to give us a glimpse of her struggles with pride, despondency, burn-out, anger, brokenness, and simply a sense of being out of control. It was a refreshing look into a missionary’s heart.

We often make the mistake of putting missionaries, pastors, and other ministry leaders on a pedestal, imposing on them a false image of perfection. This isn’t fair to those in christian service, because they, then feel they have to hide their imperfections or lose the support of others. This isn’t fair to anyone else either, because we will compare ourselves to others in christian ministry, decide we don’t measure up and give up the call on our lives. What Kim made me realize is that even those in a ministry position are not perfect and are not immune to emotional breakdowns and tantrums.

This was actually a much needed revelation for me. I have felt a call on my life to missionary service since I was a little girl. As an adult I believed Satan’s lies that I couldn’t become a missionary because:

I am not good enough

I’m not spiritual enough

I don’t have biblical training

I don’t know enough about the Bible

I’m a sinner

I’m divorced and a single mom

I will never be able to support my kids as a missionary

All of these lies have kept me from answering God’s call on my life. I believed that until I got my issues under control I could not be used in ministry. My heavenly Father knows my weaknesses: my need to control my circumstances and my impatience in waiting on Him to work. I hate to wait! I constantly have to ask myself, “is this of God or am I controlling things again?”  In his loving way, he either shuts the door if it’s not from him or he let’s me suffer the consequences of my impatience. If I had to get myself together before he could use me, it would never happen! The same goes for ALL of us! It is a constant struggle and something I deal with on a daily basis.

I finally had a heart encounter with God and I know who I am in his eyes. I am His Beloved…and although I am imperfect and sometimes a mess, through his grace, he can and will use me. If we are willing, he can and will use us all. I am so glad that my trusted Savior is always willing to prune, refine and mold me into something usable. He never gives up on me. I may be broken, but I’m still in the Potter’s hand.

moon-night1

 

As I was laying in bed last night, waiting for slumber, I heard the sounds of giggling coming from Kiowa and Cree, in the next room. As I listened to the soft banter and the childlike giggles of my 18 and 16 year old daughters, I was reminded that, as much as I delight in these daughters of mine, even more so does my heavenly Father delight in me. In my journey of parenting 5 children, I have shared the joy of achievement with them and I have shed tears of sorrow with them. I have laughed with them, wrung my hands in frustration and even yelled in anger. Through all the emotions of parenting, I have loved them deeply and always will. Through the emotional highs and lows of parenting my own kids, I have been reminded of God’s tender mercies in parenting me. I have been reminded of how God deals with me when I frustrate, disappoint and even anger him. He is always tender in his discipline, gentle in his rebuke and even when I have to suffer the consequences of my own actions, I know my Father in heaven loves me so much that he has counted every hair on my head. He convicts my spirit firmly, but is careful not to wound my heart.

My question to myself when disciplining my kids is, “is this how God disciplines me? Am I showing the same gentle correction to them that God has shown me?”  I don’t ever want to wound my children’s hearts. I want to encourage them always, even when having to discipline them. I am tempted to tell the girls to go to sleep, but decide I would rather fall asleep listening to the giggles in the night.

nick and rosie

 

As I sat in the second row watching my radiant Cherokee repeating her vows, I couldn’t help but think back to just a year ago when things were so different. Still a senior in high school, she had planned on going to nursing school and having a career. She graduated from high school in May as a member of the national honor society, with a 3.5 GPA. She started school in August, but soon realized that nursing wasn’t for her. She struggled to find where she fit and didn’t know what she wanted to do.  My strong, independent, goal oriented Cherokee seemed to be lost. That was my perception. She had been dating Nick off and on for a year at that point. I knew they spent a lot of time together, but never thought it was that serious at this point. There were some issues that needed to be worked out, so I was shocked in early October at the news that she was pregnant. She had always been a purity ring wearing God-girl and even though she was struggling in her relationship with God, I never imagined that my 19 year old Cherokee would be announcing that she was pregnant. She had just graduated high school and started college. I was shocked, but never stopped encouraging her. She left school in December and she and Nick were married on Saturday. Her desire is to be a housewife and mother. So different from this time last year, when we still shared the same dreams.

I am not sharing this with you to lament on a young life gone wrong. I learned a valuable lesson on this journey called parenthood and I hope my lesson will help others in there own journey. I realized that in my desire to help her nail down a career path I was pushing her into areas she didn’t want to go. I have had to let go of my expectations and let her live her own life and make her own decisions. She is still an intelligent, independent, strong-willed young woman and I don’t think the essence of who she is will ever change. She made a decision that changed her life, but God still has her life in his hand and he will still use her in this life. God works everything for the good for those who love him and my granddaughter is a good thing.

God has a way of taking difficult situations in our lives and turning them into our ministry. Cherokee is happy. If God has given her the desire to be a housewife and mom, then I will trust that he will equip her for that ministry. I have never seen her so beautiful! Marriage and motherhood agree with her.

Things have changed for this daughter of mine. Her path has changed and her journey will take her in a different direction than we expected, but she and Nick have a long blessed life ahead of them and a little miss Ava Rose to look forward to introducing to the world. God is in control and this young couple will be okay.

I learned that my job as a parent to her now is to love her, even when her decisions aren’t ones that I would have made and always, always pray for her. I will always be here to encourage her and support her through whatever direction her life takes. Our children will make some decisions that we don’t agree with, our children will sin, our children will show their imperfect sides to the world at times. It’s going to happen, as it does with all of us. We need to quit expecting our kids to be perfect and cut them some slack when they mess up. WE ALL mess up! Why do we come down so hard on our kids when we are imperfect ourselves? Love our kids, encourage them to live for God, and when they are less than perfect, that is the time to love them even more.

Kiowa.

 

At this moment, I am propped up on my bed fighting a nasty cold. Normally, I would be in the prayer room, but my body said otherwise. I needed this day of rest and am actually glad to have this time to catch you up on my crazy life. Monday was Kiowa’s last day of high school. I’m not sure what she is going to do. She wants to start a running group, so she may do that. She is young and her life is a blank canvas. She just has to choose the colors she wants and paint her life the way she wants it (or hopefully, the way God wants it…). The other big news, is that Cherokee is getting married Saturday. Her boyfriend, Nick, graduated Friday from basic training with the United States Marine Corps. They will get married Saturday and then he will be gone again Tuesday night. They found out that they are expecting a girl, so our little Ava Rose Fields will be making her appearance in mid June. I am so excited to be a grandma!

rosie wedding

On a more emotional level and because I promised to share the good, the bad and the ugly…I have to tell you that this wedding has been somewhat difficult for  me. Not because I don’t like Nick. I do. Cherokee and I have always been close. I am close to all of my kids, but Cherokee is the first born and she will be leaving, as soon as Nick is done with school and stationed somewhere. She and the baby will be leaving. This has been hard for me. I also, at times, struggle with the fact that she chose to live with his parents when she left school in December. She chose to live with his parents and live with the baby there until they can join Nick. In all honesty, I have dealt with the green-eyed monster called jealousy. I have had moments where I felt like Cherokee loves them more, moments when I felt like they get all the important news first, because they are “better” parents. I have found myself comparing myself to them and coming up short. Now you know…God has been dealing with me on this issue and I refuse to let the enemy wedge his way between myself and my daughter. He would love nothing more than to break this relationship and have victory. I won’t let that happen. I am aware of Satan’s tactics and I love my daughter and grand-daughter to much to let Satan win. I love my soon to be son-in-law too, and am proud of his accomplishments! I can’t say that I won’t have these feelings in the future, but I know where they stem from and I know that I have control over those feelings as long as the Holy Spirit dwells within me. I am not consumed with jealousy to the point where it would tear apart our relationship, but there are moments when something triggers that feeling and then I feel it for a day or so and then with God’s help let it go. I can’t allow myself to dwell on those feelings.

ava cute side

I will cherish the time I do have with Cherokee and Ava Rose and then when the time comes I will release them and know that God is with them and is guiding them into His purpose for their lives. He has a plan and a purpose and I, as a loving mother, need to get out of the way, as hard as that is to do. I need to trust that God loves my children even more than I do and will protect them when I can’t.

My kids are growing up and that means that I am growing older and prayerfully, wiser. I have made many mistakes along this path of parenthood, but I have done my best to raise my kids to be men and women of God. I trust that God will take my mistakes and use them for the good. As they spread their wings to fly solo, all we can do is train them up in the way they should go and trust God with the rest. Am I done parenting these two? I don’t think our jobs as parents ever end, but somehow, I think we transition into a friendship with our grown children that says, “I am here for you as a parent, but I will respect you enough to let you live your life as a friend.” The transition is never easy and I pray that God will give me the grace to listen as a friend, before I act like a parent as my children grow into their own lives.

garbage bags

This is a label that plagues approximately 500,000 kids in the United States. These are America’s foster kids. Why are they called “garbage bag kids”? because they are shuttled placement to placement carrying black trash bags with what few belongings they have. They have been labeled America’s throw away children, children who have been lost in a system of chaos and uncertainty. Once in, it’s almost impossible to get out. Over 250,000 foster kids never return home.

Foster kids are used to feeling like an outsider… used to feeling like nameless, faceless blobs among the masses. While other children are opening presents on Christmas, the foster child will be lucky to get anything and may even have the heart-wrenching job of watching a families biological children open their presents. Unfortunately, this is no exaggeration. Abuse in foster homes is just as prevalent as abuse in any other home. What makes it worse is that these kids, who may have some behavioral/emotional problems stemming from parental abuse, will be thrown out of a foster home at the first sign of trouble. Thrown out, adding even more heartache, anxiety, and pain to an innocent child’s life. This is in the system, what happens to these kids when they turn 18?

29,000 kids age out of foster care every year. Having been sheltered in the system and having received very little training in life skills, the aged out foster child is at higher risk for homelessness or incarceration. While other 18 year olds have parents to fall back on, the aged out foster care youth has no one. No one cares. The majority have not finished high school and have no way to attend college. A sense of hopelessness hangs over them like a dense fog.

So why am I telling you all this? Because I want you to care! I want the faith-based community to finally care what happens to these beautiful children! More than 250,000 children enter the foster care system each year and there are 123,000 children from foster care waiting to be adopted. There are very few christian foster homes. The Bible tells us to take care of the widow and orphan, so why are we not doing what God wants us to do? These kids deserve to live in loving homes with people who will treat them with kindness, dignity and fairness. These kids deserve to be safe, they deserve to have parents who will protect them. I am urging the christian community to open your hearts and your homes to these kids. They deserve so much more than what they’ve been given.

I was a foster child for 3 years and was moved 10 times in those years. I have felt the pain and heartache and loneliness of being an outsider in a temporary home. I was aged out at 18, completely unprepared to make it on my own. I have a heart for these kids and will dedicate the rest of my life to making sure that every one of these kids finds a loving home to call their own.

Statistical information was taken from http://www.heartgalleryofamerica.org