Dear Single Mom,
I know! I know! Who has time to think about healing? You have been tossed into this new life of being a single mom, possibly blindsided to boot, and you are barely able to keep your head above water. Who has time to heal? Let me tell you something right now, IT’S OKAY TO FOCUS ON HEALING!!! You need to heal to be the best mom possible for your kids.
I wish I could tell you that I made healing a priority early on. I did not and my kids suffered for it. I was a HOT MESS of emotions and they were the ones who had to see their mom seething with rage, trying to beat up their dad’s new girlfriend (they have been together now for 20 years and she is my BEST FRIEND). I was so overwhelmed with guilt, fear, hate, rage, bitterness, you get the point, that I failed to see that they were affected too. I made it all about me and it wasn’t all about me. Their dad has ALWAYS been in their lives and he has ALWAYS been about his kids and taking care of them, but they had to adjust to a co-mom, 4 new brothers, and a new house for us. I wish that I had focused on my healing at the beginning. If I had then I could have been there as a whole person for them. I wasn’t whole. I was a broken mess and I added to my kids burdens.
Living in regret doesn’t solve anything, so I am using my experience to tell you to focus on healing NOW! Don’t wait. I wish someone had told me that at the beginning. I learned the hard way. I am fortunate that I renewed my faith in God and began to heal the pain of my past. My kids are fine for the most part. I am blessed to be able to share my testimony with you and walk with you in your journey.
REMINDER:
You know that heartache and anger that you are feeling? Imagine what your child must be dealing with. Add confusion to the mix, because they don’t understand, and you have a child who may act out when he/she never did before. Your child may become withdrawn or depressed. I know it seems selfish to think about our own healing first, but until we are whole we can’t appropriately help our kids heal.
Don’t let any more time go by without focusing on your healing, single mom. Your kids need you mentally and emotionally healthy. If you need guidance in your healing, visit my L.I.F.E program page. It is an e-coaching program that focuses on healing and transformation. I will be there 100% of the way. You are not alone in this single mom! It’s time to heal!
Patti Burris 